Patch Notes…Notes

If for some reason you want the full, un-annotated patch notes, you can go here.  I threw it up on GDocs for people who can’t get around IT blocks like I can.  \o/

World of Warcraft Client Patch 3.3.3

PvP

Squishy Priest does not give a shit.  Squishy priest has not PvP’d since maaaybe the second season of arenas for a REASON…okay, reasonS.  Namely, rogues and warlocks.  THIS IS WHY I HATE ARRENS.  TIMES TWO.

Dungeons & Raids

Hellscream’s Warsong and Strength of Wrynn now provide their bonuses to player pet health and damage, as well as the absorption amounts of Power Word: Shield and Sacred Shield.

Thank you for ungimping me.  On two toons.  Omnomnom moar bubbles!

World Event Bosses

The previous summoning criteria for these bosses have been removed. Players can queue up for and fight each World Event boss as many times as they want for any standard loot that they may drop.
All rare holiday items (such as The Horseman’s Reins) will have a chance of being found in holiday-themed loot troves which will drop once for each player in the party no more than once per day, in the same manner that doing the Random Dungeon daily quest will provide a specific reward the first time it is completed in a day.

I would care more if I could actually be arsed to do those bosses.  But I can’t.  But I’m sure for those who do it’s…good?….yes? 

Classes: General

Several raid buffs have had their ranges increased to 100 yards, up from 45 yards, to prevent select buffs from repeatedly getting applied and removed during highly mobile encounters. Some buffs, such as paladin auras, totems, shouts and Blood Pact are intentionally meant to have shorter ranges and remain unchanged.

Death Knights

WARNING.  DEATH KNIGHTS RECIEVED BUFFS.  I REPEAT, BUFFS.  THE END OF THE WORLD IS NIGH.  Or that’s what I was told, anyway, I couldn’t be arsed to actually read/make sense of all that.

Druids

Something something feral druids creamed their pants something something.

Hunters

Talents

Beast Mastery

Ferocious Inspiration: This ability is now an aura and provides 1/2/3% damage to all party or raid members within 100 yards and boosts the damage of Steady Shot by 3/6/9%.

Pet Talents

Heart of the Phoenix: Cooldown reduced to 8 minutes, down from 10 minutes.

And we’re still the mockery of many hunters because people are twatwaffles.  But, while they are still twatwaffles, we are now somewhat less fail.  \o/

Mages

something something Frost is still boring to level with and my mage will be level 57 until WoW shuts down.

Priests

Discipline

Renewed Hope: now has a 60-second duration, up from 20 seconds, but a 15-second cooldown.

Oh look, the one pertinent part of this whole thing and I just stare blankly at it.  Yay, more duration?  I…don’t think the cool down will be an issue, really.  I mean if it was someone would have QQ’d about it already, so I’ll smile and nod and be on my merry way.

Rogues

Still kill me in PvP and become floor smears in PvE, so since the patch notes weren’t “all die in a fire” I don’t care.

Shaman

Flame Shock: The damage-over-time component of this ability can now produce critical strikes and is affected by spell haste.

My baby ele shaman might think this is kind of awesome.  Maybe.  Some day.  When she is at the point where gear has haste on it.

Talents

Elemental Oath: This ability is now always on as a passive aura.

Okay.

Warlocks

“Fixed soul shatter so that it doesn’t completely blow” was not, sadly, on this list.

Warrior

Prot “DPS” now slightly less lol. 

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  1. #1 by dorgol on March 23, 2010 - 10:36 am

    This is… a highly unique way of reading Patch Notes.

  2. #2 by Riv on March 23, 2010 - 10:40 am

    FROST IS NOT BORING!!!! IT”S PURE AWESOMENESS ITSELF!!!

  3. #3 by Kestrel on March 23, 2010 - 10:41 am

    Pretty much tells me all I need to know: Nothing changed for Holy or Shadow Priests. And remind Linedan that you don’t play a warrior (nor do I) so who cares? ;)

  4. #4 by shieldbreakr on March 23, 2010 - 10:43 am

    I have to agree w/ Riv, Frost is pretty much the hawtness, pun intended, so long as you’re not pew-ing raid bosses with it. I <3 the elusive frostbolt throwing machine my mage is quickly becoming.

  5. #5 by Ambrosine on March 23, 2010 - 10:53 am

    FROSTBOLT FROSTBOLT FROSTBOLT ZZZ. That is my mage. Fuck that noise.

  6. #6 by Poneria on March 23, 2010 - 10:53 am

    Oh, I love how you phrased the warlock patch notes. Pretty much sums it up.

  7. #7 by Paolo on March 23, 2010 - 11:20 am

    Apparently GoPWS is now being treated as a heal, which means it will proc Trauma & Abacus! WOOT! This is by far the biggest news for (disc) priests, and isn’t in most versions of the patch notes.

    http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.html?topicId=23767643755&sid=1

    Also, the change to Renewed Hope is just to thin out combat log spam. Many similar buffs from other classes were changed too.

  8. #8 by Krikket on March 23, 2010 - 12:08 pm

    Flame Shock: The damage-over-time component of this ability can now produce critical strikes and is affected by spell haste.

    I’m unsure how i feel about this. I mean, yay! Another glyph slot (because Flame Shock glyph is now tehsuck), but I cannot imagine how often I am going to have to cast Flame Shock now. Ohai, 30% haste. My “rotation” is going to be borked for like three weeks while I get used to this.

  9. #9 by Andy on March 23, 2010 - 12:15 pm

    You missed one:

    Players can no longer roll Need on Frozen Orbs in dungeons under Need Before Greed loot rules. Pass and Greed options will still be available.

    = no more orb QK

  10. #10 by Kazgrel on March 23, 2010 - 1:30 pm

    The big druid change that I can recall was the mangle debuff lasting 1 minute instead of 12 seconds or whatever (same goes to arm warrior’s Trauma debuff). It makes cat DPS a bit less retarded (and by retarded, I mean ridiculously painful to do well):

  11. #11 by Joe Ego on March 23, 2010 - 2:33 pm

    There was one stealth paladin item everyone seems to have missed:

    “Every breath you take, every move you make…”

  12. #12 by shadowtycho on March 23, 2010 - 3:10 pm

    prot dps got a boost! dont gloss over me and get it wrong!

  13. #13 by Hashshashins on March 23, 2010 - 3:21 pm

    The cooldown on Renewed Hope isn’t bad at all really, helps to stop the system overloading since disc priests have become shield spammers in 25man the combat logs were being spammed, resulting in lag. As for your mage, go fire! It is fun to play and while you are a bit squishier than frost mages your damage tends to be higher. At 64 you can go arcane and literally faceroll your way through the rest of the levels.

  14. #14 by Shayzani on March 23, 2010 - 4:35 pm

    Yeah, Frost as a leveling spec is pretty efficient but boring as fuck. Fire is pretty damn awesome if a little squishtastic and Arcane is sweet with that 2 minute evocation so just go nuts. Spec out of Frost and be free!

  15. #15 by Michelenea on March 24, 2010 - 7:59 am

    Having seen these, I will never again go to the WoW site for patch notes. You actually make them interesting.

  16. #16 by Ambrosine on March 24, 2010 - 9:10 am

    <3

  17. #17 by pndrev on March 24, 2010 - 10:15 am

    Nice read! Can’t wait for your annotated 3.3.5 notes. :P

  18. #18 by Souci on March 24, 2010 - 11:36 am

    thing1:
    favorite. patch notes. ever.

    thing 2:
    Something something feral druids creamed their pants something something.

    i think it’s a Mangle thing – but i don’t kitty, so i didn’t pay attention. BUT! also, your boomkins got a buff to Starfall & a glyph that makes it cool down faster. what this translates to:
    WE WILL BE HAVING YER AGGRO AND PANICKIN” ZOMGBBQ

    i apologize in advance.
    xoxoxo
    ~Shrove

  19. #19 by HP on March 24, 2010 - 1:18 pm

    hahaha, I love your summary of the patch notes. I really hate it when people just copy paste patch notes but your made the patch notes yours!

  1. Quick QQ « Swift Retribution
  2. Patch Notes…Notes « I Like Bubbles « Parsley's Blog

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