Inspired by KT.

Dear DPS,

I’m going to let you in on a little secret. 

The healers know when you need heals.

See that there?  That is what I stare at.  All the time.  Let’s review it real quick, shall we?

Feet: Only important to me.  By keeping these in my view (or rather, by keeping you guys near where I might happen to notice), I know when there’s bad stuff I need to move out of.

You guys:  I can see ALL OF YOU.  ALL THE TIME.  When your green bars go down, I know by how much!  When you have a debuff, it makes a neat colored outline!  When the other healers are out of mana or dead  and I’m the only one in the whole entire world who can save you, I am keenly aware of this fact.

Important stuff:  Unlike everyone else, I watch my chat log for DBM announcements.  On KT, this lets me know things like: who is going to ‘asplode!  And who has FB and is gonna die omg soon!  DBM/X-Perl even marks your little boxes (see above) with a SKULL.  So I’m all like OMG THAT PERSON THERE.   All this important stuff I’m reading tells me who needs heals OMG NAO far better than your screaming over vent.  So when I tell you to be quiet over vent so I can calmly announce these things to my other healers in case they’re distracted by someone else trying to die, I actually…want you to be quiet.  Because I really do see you dying there.  I do.  And maybe some new healers in the raid don’t recognize Person X Screaming, thus making my calls actually important. 

Maybe.

In summary, 99% of the time, we know when you’re dying.  Please don’t yell about it. 

I extend a little more leniency towards tanks-having tanked, I know well the unique form of panic that starts to rise as your health dips into the “oh shit” range.  If it bubbles over into an “Oh my god oh my god HEAL MEH” over vent, I can understand.  

But you, mister DPS?  Sshhh. 

Or, you know, move out of the red stuff. 

Dear Fellow Raiders,

When you have the skull above your head because you are about to ‘aspode, I DON’T WANT A HUG.  I know that sometimes the red stuff is trying to eat you, but the fact remains: I DON’T WANT A HUG.  Go hug the hunter!  He’s not important!

Dear Sapph,

BITE ME.

Dear KT,

That wipe at 5% was exasperating, to put it mildly.  But that just means you’re dead this week, buddy.

, ,

  1. #1 by kyrilean on February 10, 2009 - 1:05 pm

    Gratz on Sapph! In the immortal words of Captain James T. Kirk, “Let them die!”

  2. #2 by Ambrosyne on February 10, 2009 - 2:13 pm

    The bosses, or the DPS? ;)

  3. #3 by Myssidia on February 10, 2009 - 7:53 pm

    Right. I love hearing “Can one of you idiots please not let me die?” over vent then replying with “First, if you’re dead it’s probably because you did something wrong. Second, your voice = which cow scratching his ass on the puter screen?”

    Also… I don’t blame them for wanting you to be the last person they hug before death? =3 (/snickers and collects his brownie points)

  4. #4 by Anea on February 11, 2009 - 12:11 am

    This was a great post. I wish I could refer people to this page everytime there is freaking out over vent. I mean really…

  5. #5 by Alex on February 11, 2009 - 3:55 am

    a big grin and a fat thx for that blog entry!

  6. #6 by Phoenix on February 11, 2009 - 12:40 pm

    I stop healing DPS who annoyingly and consistently call for healing. In the future, I think I’ll refer them to this blog as well. “I KNOW YOU’RE DYING.”

  7. #7 by Dueg on February 11, 2009 - 12:42 pm

    Note to all raiders who like to hug when they’re about to ‘asplode: Deadly Boss Mod? GET IT! When you’re at KT, type /range. See that? If my name shows up on there, we’re not friends anymore.

  8. #8 by rocklawthepally on February 11, 2009 - 12:44 pm

    Well done on Sapph. KT will come. We got our 3 KT kill last night on our first one-night clear of Naxx. The Divine Plea nerf was, as you suggest, not that big a deal, as long as you use it strategically.

    We’ve got a good group that’s been together a long time so we only call out our names on things like Maexxna cocoons or Sapph blocks, etc. They all trust myself and the other healers. But I’ve been in raids with those kind of annoying DPS types, barking for heals. And yes, I’ve let them die :)

  9. #9 by Gormat on February 11, 2009 - 12:57 pm

    If only the other 11,499,990 other WoW players would read this, and understand yelling for heals isn’t going to get them healed any faster, as you mentioned you are constantly watching them.

    Yelling for heals, especially on vent is like the ugly American in another country who thinks that yelling at the top of their lungs they want a beer is going to make the poor non-english speaking server understand them.

  10. #10 by Mizzozzô on February 11, 2009 - 1:31 pm

    Nice post! xD

  11. #11 by Neikem on February 11, 2009 - 1:33 pm

    Being a healer since day one when logging into WoW, I echo what you say 100%. From the beginning before I had any addons to help keep watch on health, to when I got the addons to monitor health to an exact number, to the countless raids that I had to heal teach other healers said encounters….you always will have those that cry for heals. I hate anyone that does whether it be DPS, tanks, or fellow healers. Trust me, Im all over the health like a fat kid on a cupcake and so help me if its possible to pull out a heal before you die I ensure you I will land it on you. If I dont, I will be the first to man up and appologize as its my goal to have zero deaths.

    In any case, I hate being yelled at when it comes to “zomg ware bee muh heelz”. Im sure you and other need them and you dont hear them stressing. If its from gaining aggro, slack off or drop it by whatever means your class has that. You see my cloth wear butt get to the tank so he can rip it off me, do your part too. If you guys die, I die. I dont like dying -.-

  12. #12 by anon on February 11, 2009 - 2:07 pm

    Hahah thanks for the laughs! Absolutely hilarious :) It sounds like my guildies are a bit more well-behaved over vent, but I’ve certainly healed the occasional pickup group where the silly DPS starts hollering at 50%.

  13. #13 by Steven on February 11, 2009 - 2:25 pm

    Great post. An added reason not to yell for heals is that there is that voice chat adds a 1-2 second delay. By the time any healer hears you (and processes your voice), you will likely already have heals landing on you, or be dead.

  14. #14 by Kestrel on February 11, 2009 - 3:12 pm

    First time here (clicked from Ego’s blog); won’t be the last. FANTASTIC article and oh, so true! I love it when our RL says over Vent “Oh I’m going to die!” just as the Greater Heal lands, and I get to say “Don’t be such a crybaby, or I’ll let you die.”

    Adding you to the Aerie blogroll right.now.

  15. #15 by Ambrosyne on February 11, 2009 - 3:15 pm

    Yeeeeah. That delay is also why I try to get everyone with DBM or something similar, so they can go off their own warnings.

    Buuuuut sometimes we miss things, so it’s nice to have vent clear for verbal notification, delay or not.

    And, well, I don’t like to get yelled at. I already feel bad when you die (unless we LET you die…and yes, yes we really do that). But sometimes it’s a judgement call, too-I can keep the tank alive, or you. Tank is greater than DPS. Sorry, buddy! Please have quieter death throes!

    @ Kestrel – O SNAP HAI. I read your blog, but it’s blocked at work so I can never comment. I forget by the time I get home. <3 I HAVE BEEN NOTICED BY THE KESTREL. LIFE IS NOW COMPLETE.

    …well okay, maybe not quite, but I’m dorking out over here anyway.

  16. #16 by BobTurkey on February 11, 2009 - 4:47 pm

    Heh heh awesome post. Totally agree. Thankfully im in a guild where they realise wipes are usually not the healers fault.

  17. #17 by Dochealsgood on February 11, 2009 - 6:43 pm

    Great Article….not only 100% true but funny as well. Well Done. From a fellow healer, THANK YOU.

  18. #18 by Sarna on February 12, 2009 - 10:26 am

    As a dps’er, I did find this article funny. Yes, I do occasionally squeak “Help” on vent when I’m dying from a dot. They know me by accent alone though :P Aussie chick – American guild. They don’t take my squeaking seriously though, and neither do I. I’m good at voices though, so I’ve made a few laugh.
    Normally, as in, 99% of the time, I just move back near the healer and wait until they get around to my heals. Feint, Vanish, Shadowmeld… Hey, I’m a nelf rogue for a reason :P (They don’t always work, but…) In a serious run, the tank’s taking damage too. I don’t want to tank. I’m too squishy, and I don’t vocalize my opinion of the boss’ mother and linage as well as the tank does. He keeps agg. Keep him alive, I don’t want to tank Mr Boss!

    There are some really bad dps’ers though… One guy we saw started demanding heals as soon as his health started dropping. Then cracked it he didn’t get healed until he was 50%! Dude! I got to 75%, did higher dps then you, pulled agg off the tank, dropped agg back to the tank, and I’m not complaining!

    Then there was the healer who thought he was a tank, pulled when the tank was waiting for the pat to pass, and healed himself more than anyone else. The tank got 1 heal. He got 5. The rest of the group? 0. We didn’t make it past the first room of Mech. And then he had the nerve to blame the tank and leave.

    So, yeah. Healers know what they are doing. If they don’t, you know within minutes. Demanding “Heal me now!” isn’t going to help. Me squeaking just makes them laugh (which is intended. And yes, I do squeak.) They know by the Aussie accent it’s me, and usually a few lol’s when someone’s rezzing me. Probably because I’m putting on a silly voice and mourning over the roadkill on my screen…. I died. So? At least I’m not tanking….

  19. #19 by Milhojas on February 12, 2009 - 1:00 pm

    Why feet? You should be looking what’s going on on the screen too. Yesterday, while I was in the middle of a cast (2.5 secs for chain heal) I saw a mob running from the melee group to the ranged group. Clicked on the mob, saw a hunter as his target and started to cast a heal on him. If a tank get the mob back (I thought), it’s OK. I can just cancel the cast. But in this case it didn’t happen on time, the hunter got hit for about 12k, the heal landed (about 9k), I began to cast another heal, another hit to the hunter (another 12k) and just then a tank pulled the mob back. The guy should have died, but I saved him with that first heal. That’s just an example, but believe me, watching the screen for a fraction of a second works wonders ^_^

  20. #20 by Ambrosyne on February 12, 2009 - 1:43 pm

    I’m kind of watching the screen-I’ve been known to whack a stray mob with HoJ. But typically I notice the aggro alert around a DPS’s frame first, and react from that.

    When the priest’s frame goes red, it usually means we’ve found a shade. :D

  21. #21 by Kestrel on February 12, 2009 - 3:28 pm

    /snicker at Shade comment.

    We were running Heroic Naxx a week or two ago, doing Construct (I think). One of my healers was lagging a bit, or something…at any rate, he (holy priest) was bringing up the rear. Suddenly over Vent we hear him scream, “SH-SHADE!” (yes, he stuttered a bit). I think it popped right on top of him.

    I turned around just in time to see Spirit of Redemption floating above the melee group, which was by then destroying said shade. But the scream was classic…and the teasing has yet to get old. ;)

  22. #22 by Ambrosyne on February 13, 2009 - 12:36 pm

    @Kestrel – It’s a running joke now, because the Shade seems to find Tkon all. the. time. Not any of the other healers-just Tkon.

    When I was coming up with a silly name for our healer channel (because BoOHeals is just not my style) I was really torn between LetHuntDie and ShadesEatTkon. LetHuntDie ended up winning, but it was really, really close…

    Hunt is our resident hunter, of course. :P

  23. #23 by kyrilean on February 13, 2009 - 12:58 pm

    That must be an ongoing theme because it was our tree that kept getting attacked. It’s a joke that we can scan the entire room and not find him, but our tree can! :)

  24. #24 by bem on March 19, 2009 - 8:44 am

    Its so true

    -Bem

  1. n57 : Information at its best! » Blog Archive » Healers know you’re dying. Don’t yell.
  2. Healers know you’re dying. Don’t yell. | Warcraft-News.com
  3. Healers know you’re dying. Don’t yell. | DailyWarcraft.com
  4. Monday WoW Pick-Me-Up « Holy Discipline

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