That’s Not A Fondue Pot: Ignis Strat

Basic Concepts:

  • Don’t stand in the fucking fire
  • DPS what you’re told WHEN you’re told, mister
  • Lookie for the boss mod alert o’ bad shit is coming
  • LOL DAMAGE EVERYWHERE (because we can’t come up with some new way to challenge healers)

Needed for this fight:
MT, OT (x2 for 25s), OT’s DPS Bitch

The MT can do one of two things: drag Ignis around the room shitting fire, or he can tank him next to the pool.  I prefer that he be tanked next to the pool, and then the tank can turn him towards the pool to extinguish unneeded fires (Scorch).  Just don’t, you know, do that for all of them.  Don’t ever ever ever turn him towards the raid ’cause he’ll decide to drop a fire there.  See: Strats, RNG Boss.

The OT will be grabbing the construct adds.  These need to be dragged into fire and kept there until they become molten.  Once they’re molten, they are dragged into the pool of water, thus turning them brittle.   You can root/stun/whatever the buggers.  As soon as they are brittle, a ranged DPS capable of 5k crits  (the OT’s DPS Bitch) needs to kill the buggers.  This needs to happen quickly.  If you do not grab loose constructs, they will OMNOMNOM your healers.  Unless you feel like having the healers scream your name with the fury of a thousand molten suns, you will keep an eye out for new adds being summoned.  Sometimes you’ll be juggling two or more, because Ignis loves to shove your DPS Bitch in his love pocket over and over and over.  Then when he’s done doing that he’ll shove the OT in there, but never mind the RNG Boss right now.  The reason why ranged shatters the brittle targets is because they Asplode for Big Ow Damage (20k, 10 yds)  when they die.  Alas you can’t just ignore the constructs, because if you don’t kill them Ignis acquires a stacking buff of LOL I’LL ONE SHOT THE TANK. 

Healers stand in the middle.  The tank healer should really focus on no one but the tank-in fact, tank healers should learn right now that if you take your heals off the tank on most  fights to try to “help”, the boss will chose that moment to offer your tank surprise buttsechs without lube.  Hi, welcome to Ulduar! 

You don’t need to assign a healer just to the OT, but keep an eye on him-you might need to scoot around some, because they have this obnoxious having of running OORto play in the kiddie pool.   Feel free to yell, “Atropus, get the fuck back here!”, subsituting whatever the name of your scrub OT is. 

Periodically he’ll do something called Flame Jets.  For the love of all that is holy, stop fucking casting.  Casting anything but instant spells during flame jets will get you spell locked.  We’ve all seen our entire bar go POOF and made the D: face: don’t  do it!  He’ll often do Flame Jets while someone OMG REALLY NEEDS HEALS in the  crotch pot of dubiously vibrator like form, so toss a HoT and a bubble and pray.   Unless it’s the rogues.  Rogues just die.

Disc priests can pre-bubble.  One of the raid healers should be in charge of keeping people in the Vibrating Crotch Pot alive, but if a healer is thrown in there, they can usually heal themselves.  If the MT healer is thrown in, make sure someone else takes over tank heals.

If you’re just plain ol’ DPS this fight, you dont’ have a lot to worry about.  Pew pew the boss!  If you’re a caster, stop non-instant casts during Flame Jets unless you can afford to be locked out of a school.  Don’t stand in the fire.  Every so often Ignis will toss you in his Pot of Unwanted Attention, and if you haven’t annoyed the healers too much they’ll keep you alive…until he drops you into the fire at his feet at low health and kills you.

,

  1. #1 by Skryla on July 28, 2009 - 12:56 pm

    You, my dear, are awesome! I’m re-posting this on my guild forums!

    I have the entire guild calling it the “crotchpot of vibrating love”, so it’s only fitting they know where I got it from.

  2. #2 by Adgamorix on July 28, 2009 - 1:57 pm

    Yet another fight where Disc is awesome…

  3. #3 by Light on July 28, 2009 - 2:06 pm

    Hilarious :)

  4. #4 by Maebius on July 29, 2009 - 2:33 am

    yep, my guild is just attempting this guy on 10-man fir the first (18th?) time. I think we downed him once last week, but that’s all, and it’s nowhere near on farm yet since hte next few tries were wipes.
    it’s a fun, frenetic and frustrating fight.
    CrotchPot for teh Lose!

  5. #5 by Fuubaar on July 29, 2009 - 8:02 am

    My biggest frustration with MTing this fight is when he sprays his black tar of death on the ground, it doesn’t just stay there. It can do a multitude of things that just really grind my gears.

    A) It is dropped where he said he would put it
    B) He Drops it and it never hits the floor… whao?
    C) It blinks so you don’t know if it’s going to stay there or stobe out
    D) ??????

    I’m not quite sure if these spots are “supposed” to be consistant but I’ll tell you one thing

    “It’s working as intended” <3 Blizzard

  6. #6 by Ambrosyne on July 29, 2009 - 8:56 am

    @Fuubaar – We’ve had the boss turn and drop it ON THE RAID for no apparent reason. Cue entire raid running around in a panic screaming, and Fail Angels sprouting.

  7. #7 by wantedpriest on July 29, 2009 - 11:13 am

    OMG I snortled my coffee when I read the healers stand in the middle paragraph.

    I hate Ignis. On our last attempt at him in 10-man, the crotch pot order went OT, OT DPS Bitch, OT DPS Bitch, OT. Thanks Blizz. Great stuff.

    Vess

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