Why I Tank

I tank on 4 different toons for two reasons.  Well, I do kind of enjoy tanking as well, but that’s beside the point.

1) Faster queues.  Even a healer has to wait one or two WHOLE MINUTES for a group.  What the fuck.

By “suck” I don’t mean just generally fail at getting aggro.  I mean suck as in not even TRYING to have decent gear.  And by decent mear I mean “things even remotely suited for tanking”.

If you are a paladin and your gear consists of ungemmed Kara tanking epics, 1 random Kara epic DPS belt, and half SPELL POWER GEAR, some of which is LEATHER, then FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY WHY ARE YOU QUEUING AS A TANK. 


We wiped on the last boss of Utgarde Keep, twice, because there was no way I could pour my whole mana bar into him and keep everyone else alive at the same time.  I have never mashed all my buttons so hard so fast in my entire tree life.  Only to die. 

I also had a DK in partial SP plate (WHY).   I just…I…what is this I don’t even.

Since I run into many more bad tanks than bad healers, back to bear-LFDing I go.


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  1. #1 by Askevar on June 29, 2010 - 9:54 am

    I have a second dk that is strictly dps – dw dps. When our tank dc’d I managed to tank the last boss in UK… the disc healer assured me it’d be fine and “let’s just do it!” They kept me alive like a champ… and I was popping cds left and right…

    They had less trouble keeping me up than the previous dk on trash pulls

  2. #2 by Rades on June 29, 2010 - 10:55 am

    Partial SP plate – my DK tank wore the SP plate from Ramparts for quite a while simply because it had an unbelievable three slots I could fill with Northrend gems. Though I felt a little ashamed the whole time.

  3. #3 by Argon on June 29, 2010 - 11:23 am

    Reg UK is pretty brutal, because the difficulty has been kicked up to WotLK levels, but people are still wearing a ton of BC gear.

  4. #4 by Escobar on June 29, 2010 - 11:27 am

    I feel your pain. I’m leveling a priest at the moment – level 42 now. I don’t expect miracles, but come on. The tanks I usually random in with don’t even let me loot before they’re off pulling something else. And it’s not just one or two or even three something elses, it’s massive packs that all like to slam the crap out of them. So by the time I make it to where they are, I have to cast a huge heal, and half of what the tank has pulled then tries to kill me because Wonder Meat Shield hasn’t gotten any aggro on it.

    And drinking? HA! Of course, I don’t need to, since I have a 20k mana pool and 1k mp5 in my ICC gear…oh, wait.

    I’m finding that I actually prefer to heal tanks that are new to the game at these levels. They pull conscientiously and don’t freak out if you have to stop to drink. The veterans are used to their ICC gear, they pull like it, and then they act like you’re full of fail if you can’t heal like it. Breakneck Uldaman pacing SEEMS like a good idea, but…

  5. #5 by Andy on June 29, 2010 - 11:43 am

    That’s part of the reason I levelled a DK tank – to give the occassional random group a less painful experience than usual. Although, DPS DKs in frost presence >.<

    Tis also why I'm (sort of) levelling a warrior tank, although I've found at low levels the DPS rarely give you a chance to pull carefully (i.e. properly).

  6. #6 by Jasyla on June 29, 2010 - 12:48 pm

    I did Ahune the other day on a dps class with a tank who couldn’t keep aggro on anything. The big elemental who spawns first ran off and killed the healer. When someone called the tank on his inability to pick up multiple adds his response was “yeah, I’m a warrior, duh”. /sigh

    Then there are the DKs who queue as tanks even though they are completely in DPS gear and specs. Just because you wear plate doesn’t mean you can tank.

  7. #7 by Xerian on June 29, 2010 - 1:52 pm


    well, the first add should be tanked, that’s true, but all the other little addthingies don’t really need to be tanked. They die quickly and don’t do much damage.

    In this fight, the tank’s job ends after the Ahunite Hailstone is down. Unless the tank wants a challenge in trying to collect everything which isn’t really going to work anyway :D

  8. #8 by Ary on June 29, 2010 - 2:14 pm

    I feel the exact same way. Pally and Druid tanks are what I have. I hardly play my Hunter and Priest DPS anymore just for the fact I hate terrible PUGs ><! As a tank you (hopefully) control the group. Unless there's that one damn Huntard or Warlock who feels they should be the tank -_- …They usually die fairly quickly because I hate putting up with that.

  9. #9 by LabRat on June 29, 2010 - 2:47 pm

    I actually like Ahune a lot specifically BECAUSE I like picking up and hanging on to all the little adds. One occasionally gets away from me, but it’s a fun little mini-game for me when I’m at a point in gear where heroics are something I can do blindfolded and drunk. Being a paladin helps a lot.

    Now, ask my frost DK tank colleague what HE thinks of Ahune, especially after the healer who ran oom in two minutes blamed the wipe on him not hanging onto all those little adds…

  10. #10 by Ambrosine on June 29, 2010 - 2:58 pm

    @Jasyla – A fresh DK can tank fine in thier blue starter gear, DPS stats or not. I have both tanked this way AND healed DK tanks in that state.

    Granted this is me and Ori DK tanking, and we’re at least knew how to spec. :P

    But that’s at 58. At 68, you’d better have some fucking tanking gear!

  11. #11 by Jasyla on June 29, 2010 - 3:18 pm

    Even if they can’t pick up all the adds, the tank should at least make an effort. Saying they can’t keep threat on multiple things because of their class gets very little sympathy from me. My fresh level 80 warrior has tanked the encounter a few times and I try my very best to keep anyone in my group from ever taking a hit, even if the adds don’t hit very hard. Isn’t that what meat shields do?

    I’m sure there are some talented people out there who can make things work with non-tanking gear – but those generally aren’t the ones I get grouped with :)

  12. #12 by theerivs on June 29, 2010 - 3:52 pm

    I got to say, I rock as a tank. My defense is 514 already at level 76. I don’t think I had a wipe since level 72 months ago.

    For me though tanking is like riding a bike, once you do it. You never forget. :P

  13. #13 by Christian on June 29, 2010 - 4:44 pm

    People ask why Blizzard needs to simply gear and stats. Situations like this is exactly why. But then again, you can’t fix stupid…

  14. #14 by Golle on June 29, 2010 - 6:27 pm

    I so love being a druid tank now. Of all the complaints in here none applies to me. Tanking Ahune for me is so easy it’s boring. Tank big add, np. Oh noes, 2 adds spawned – run around spamming swipe for a few seconds. Situation under control.

    Tankgear while tanking? Hehe, daily HC for me is equipping my offset DPS-gear (97% arp) and just run around pawning my partymembers on the DPS-chart.

    Def cap? Sure I’ll just put 3 points into this talent and I’m good to go!

  15. #15 by Pindleskin on June 30, 2010 - 2:04 am

    The worst I’ve encountered (In Wailing caverns) was a tauren warrior queued as tank with no weapon, no shield and wearing cloth. On further inspection I noticed he had his starting white mace equipped but it was broken. He rushed in, thunderclapped and immediately lost agro to the healer. To help him along there was a mage that melee’d and a warlock that wanded.
    The dps priest (that was healing) and I (a twinked rogue) had so much fun duo’ing that instance :)
    But yeah, you don’t find many leveling tanks taking pride in what they’re doing. They do it for the queue times and don’t bother with stuff like mitigation, threat generation, def caps, etc.

  16. #16 by Koch (Aszune) on June 30, 2010 - 2:28 am

    I .. err… have to admit to tanking on a paladin in spellpower plate in Utgarde Keep.

    *waits patiently for the boos and hisses to die down*

    Well now – I had not played that paladin since way back in TBC when I focused on my poor warrior again. And back then (as some may or may not remember) spellpower was actually the tank stat of choice. Stamina, defense and spellpower – none of this strength malarkey people use now.

    And well… there is no way to change your gear from “wrongohsowrong” to “what is proper now” without actually doing some dungeoning. Although – in retrospect – it might have been better to grab the quest rewards and some auction house things before going.

    Ah well.

  17. #17 by Splat on June 30, 2010 - 4:33 am

    I’ve gone back to playing a hunter because I’m comfortable soloing group content (even a bit of Gnomer at level) and I don’t have to put up with “tanks” that have no idea what they’re doing, pull 4 groups when I’m OOM, then blame me when they die.

  18. #18 by Resto on June 30, 2010 - 11:53 am

    Yeah I remember when I was leveling my druid, everytime I poped in into a dungeon I used to inspect the tanks… and omg seriously I never went nerd rage on them just said, “sorry guys this is not going to work” and drop group, the worst tank i had was a dk using CLOTH Boots and legs man… oh man…

  19. #19 by Necrosaro on July 12, 2010 - 11:35 pm

    I remember in Auchenai Crypts I had a DK tank wearing the Spell Power/Int cloth from SFK. I nearly had an aneurysm trying to explain to him why that wasn’t acceptable tanking gear.

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