Posts Tagged Guild Big Sister

Why My Guild Is Awesome

Someone-I think it was Ashley/Mikata, our intrepid KittyTree-decided to dub me the guild HR lady.   Someone then established a Complaint Box thread on our guild forums, and Ron submitted this lovely gem:

I could totally see Amber as the HR lady so long as the below is met.


A “bleep” buzzer to cover up the swear words when the stupids ask questions. The buzzer must be able to sound for at minimum 20 consecutive seconds.

OSHA will officially stand for ‘Oh Shit, Hide it’s Amber’.

Personal space may be breached only by the ‘Stupid Stick’.

Complaints can be logged and will be promptly answered by her middle finger. If the middle finger is out ill or on vacation, the back of her hand will assume all responsibilities.

For those who would like to see their name in red on ‘the list’, please place the palm of your hand near your nose. Place the list in the open space between your nose and palm. Close your eyes… < whack > … see red? … we’re done here.

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I put the fun in raiding…wait.

So I was poking through my reader and spotted this post by Kyr.


I really do love /rw.

I really do love /rw.

I’d like to say that there’s some reasoning behind the way I explain boss fights. For one thing, nothing drives me battier than explaining a fight normally and then having to tell everyone what they need to do after the fact, individually, because they didn’t pay a lick of attention.  Admittedly even I have to force myself to pay attention when Steve explains something, and half the time I tab out and read about the fight elsewhere if I haven’t already. 

There’s also the fact that sometimes the “official” descriptions can be…lacking.  What’s going to give you the clearer idea: kill Gift of Eonar when they spawn on Freya?  Or kill the green trees? 

I don’t know about you, but I would walk into that fight going “What the hell does a Gift of Eonar look like and OH GOD WHY AREN’T THE ADDS DYING”, which seems to be exactly what happened on our Freya attempts, come to think of it….

Then, of course, there’s the simple fact that…you REMEMBER the funny shit.  You don’t remember your GM droning on and on and on, and it also lightens the mood for the learning wipes to come. 

I also like poking fun at Blizzard.  That’s why I made comments on Hodir like, “Snow is bad, mmmkay, except when it is good.”  Think about it: “Run away from falling snow!  Get away from circles on the ground!  ….unless there’s about to be flash freeze, and then you run ONTO the snow, okay?  Only not too early, ’cause then it throws you across the room.  But not too late, either, ’cause then you freeze.  Oh and the edges?  Don’t count.” 

The only fucking difference between the good snow and the bad snow is the size of the gods be damned circles!  So there I am, strafing, looking at my raid frames,  looking for raid warnings, AND trying to decipher if that’s a big circle or a little circle?  ajhdasjhdajhd. 

I do love the fight though, and once you get the hang of it it’s not difficult.  Unless you’re our rogue, apparently.  Damn floor eaters!

Last but not least, I just enjoy being funny.  Considering the “state of things” for some of us, the financially strained, the worried, the jobless…a little laughter goes a long way.

Now if I could just get Steve to not explain things the boring way right after I explain the fun way, we’d be good!  Though…if they didn’t explain things the boring way, I wouldn’t have an excuse for my silly /rw interjections.  Hmmmm.

Kyr and I seriously discuss upcoming paladin changes.

Kyr and I seriously discuss upcoming paladin changes.

I also joined a Naxx25 put on Lyr to test out Holy.  First off, it’s weird.  Second off, I miss my bubbles.  Third off, the first time I died I totally forgot all about, you know, doing something other than stare at my Fail Angel is dismay. 

Her name is Sue, by the way.

I don’t think that a Naxx pug is the BEST way to test the spec for how I’ll be using it in Ulduar, but it gave me time to feel it out a little.  I have some UI tweaks to make, I think.  We’ll see how it goes tonight in Ulduar, and I do still have my disc spec to fall back on.  I hope that we do really well tonight, so that we have plenty of time to get Hodir down and poke some other keepers on Monday!


That Naxx pug was also sad.  So I’ll leave you with a couple of open letters!

Dear Fellow Priest,

Please learn the difference between Mind Blast and Mind Control.  Really.  Please.  Lrn2tooltip.

The Other Priest

Dear Men Boys in Pugs,

Let’s say there’s a GIRL in your pug.  Holy shit!!!!  If she happens to mention in passing that it’s really warm in the room she’s in (“brb, need to see wtf is wrong with the AC, it’s too damn hot in here”), that is NOT your cue to /whisper something about how she should take her clothes off!  For one thing, it’s kind of rude, if not creepy, for you to say to a complete stranger.  For another…dude, I’ve already thought of that, mmkay?  Go back to stealing porn.

No love,

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Letters from Ulduar

Dear ___: Open Letters To My Guild Mates, or Why Amber Goes Insane

Dear DPS on Iron Council,

Don’t stand over there.  I can’t heal you.  I kind of need to stand near my tank, and my tank kind of needs to stand over here.

Okay, so you’re now standing in such a way that my green box is lit up.  I can heal you and you can stop bitching about not getting heals.  Cool!  …do you wanna come closer for Power Infusion? 

Sometimes we’re kinda busy, and when dickhead over there refuses to move out of the blue circle and starts shitting lightning everywhere, it’s…well…ouchy.  But our holy priest has this nifty thing called a lightwell!  It’s sitting right there!  …why is the holy pally the only one near it?

…I still can’t reach you with PI, you know.  Oh well, your DPS loss.  I’ll keep it for myself.

…why the fuck are you all the way on the opposite side of the room again?

Weeping silently, on the inside,
-your healer


Dear DK Tank,

I’m standing on the left.  You keep running away from Overload (or whatever)…to the right.  WHY?
I have a heart attack every time your box goes gray.

Weeping less silently on the inside now,
-your healer


Dear Josh,

My beloved.  You have tanked for me for years.  I am comfortable with your ways.  I know you are a clever, clever tank-one who will use his cooldowns, not run out of range, wait for my mana, and gather up all the adds that love to come give me hugs.


Is well past weeping and now sobbing,
-your healer*
*this is a post in and of itself


Dear GM,

No, I don’t want to heal without replen on Iron Council.
No, I really don’t.
Yes, my mana bar does get kicked in the nuts.
Yes, it is kind of important. 
No, I don’t think that having the Surv hunter go MM to help the DK tank kick that damn boss out of the blue runes will make up for the lack of replen. 
The whole instance is designed ar-

-your healer


Dear fellow priest,

Thank you, Ron, for displaying mana regen meters and explaining to Mach why no replen is Bad.  I will refrain from killing people for yet another day.

Love and butterflies,
-the bubble dispenser


And last but not least, a tidbit from the Hodir attempts:
“Why the hell did you die like that, Atropus?”
“…oh!  I wasn’t jumping!”

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Musings: Healing Assignments

Dueg wrote a post about how he ended up getting stuck doing healing assignments, and the delicate balancing act that requires.

As I’ve touched on before I’ve ended up with this job, often to my consternation.  Sometimes I’ll be sitting there with Surgeon General open, hem hawing over assignments, when Mach will go, “Okay, pulling!” despite the fact that I…totally did not click on the ready button.  ‘Cause, you know, it’s under my damn addon window.  But whatever.  That’s Steve being a scrub. 

So I know paladins, and I know disc priests.  I know holy priests to an extent, but shamans and druids are my weak point.  Naturally they’re half our healing team.  I do better at knowing my team as individuals-Preamus is an amazingly adaptable disc priest, Yarp can heal the tank all damn day, and Zuki will fail the Ledge Boss if I don’t levitate him.  >.>   ilu, Zuki.  We’ll not speak of the time I failed the ledge boss.  Nope!

Comments you might see in our healer channel:
After Mach pulls and I wasn’t ready: hdsasdasdasdk wing it!
During fights where no real assignments are required: blah blah blah heal stuff and don’t die
and: If my assignments are retarded, or you’re bored, or something, let me know!

In our 25s, there’s generally 3 types of assignments.  You’re on one of the tanks, you’re on the raid, or you’re “floating”.  If you’re floating, that simply means I…didn’t really know what the hell to do with you, and trust your judgement enough to put your heals where it looks like they’re needed.  

I tend to use the holy paladins and the disc priests on tanks (duh), and on fights with spike damage I’ll use the druids to help…even things out, so to speak.  Resto Druid + Disc priest on the Maexxna tank also helps on those “oh shit can’t heal” moments.  Our resto druids do a lot of AoE healing duties because we only have the one holy priest, and our shamwow can’t make every raid.

It’s…interesting, and I’m terribly paranoid about sucking at it (which is nothing new for me).   Of course I haven’t had anyone TELL me I suck at it yet, though I know I need work.  Ron’s been great with making suggestions, at least.

In the quest for more feedback, I’ve posted asking for people to tell me what they like/dislike doing, and so forth.  We’ll see if that actually does any good or not!

I didn’t intend to get landed with this job though, damn it!

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Random rants are random.

So last night’s Naxx run was…uh…

…not great.  It started off with Zoja-aka mah Josh-running late, because he hadn’t fully gotten his new computer up and running yet.

“Didn’t he have time between getting home and the raid, Amber?”

Well, yeah, but I took it.  So there.  Josh is a smart man and knows that I win, even over a shiny new computer that gets like 80 fps in Naxx25 (I hate you, Josh).

So anyway, he was installing vent and stuff and running a bit behind.  We also had a couple of no shows, and Steve morphed into CRANKY STEVE.  There’s something about a cranky GM that’s contagious, unfortunately, and I had to…gently remind…one of our officers that yelling shut up over vent wasn’t terribly conductive.  Despite the air of stupid in the raid that night, we weren’t quite that bad. 

Not to say that I was not cranky.  I was cranky, trust me.  Do you know how to make a healer cranky?  Let me tell you a few ways:

-Say sarcastically after a wipe: “Thanks for the heals.”
One of our DPS did this last night, and it’s just as well we only did one boss after that because he entered the No Heals For You Zone.  Where the fuck was the DPS, man?  If you’d killed it faster you totally wouldn’t have needed heals!  It was an accidental double pull in this case (to my understanding-this healer was hanging around the boss for lewtz).  When extra mobs are pulled, who tends to die first?  If you guessed THE HEALERS, then CONGRATS YOU WIN!!!!  Seriously, what the hell?  I again “gently” reminded people not to make those sort of remarks.

-Say, on the Dance Master Boss, that you need cleanses.
No shit?  So do a dozen other people.  Bite me.  
It would go faster if all the healers were actually cleansing, but that’s another kettle of fish.  

Also, touching upon the whole raiding with a significant other topic: I am not his fucking babysitter.  Dating a raid leader and tank apparently has its issues.

Where is he?  What, do I look like a Josh GPS Tracker?  I don’t know-he got up and left the room.  He mentioned getting food, didn’t he?  Then he’s probably in the kitchen!   I don’t feel the need to give minute by minute Josh Updates to the five people who whisper me.  

Is he going to dock his own DKP for being late?  No, he’s totally going to be a douche and abuse the fact that he is Teh DKP Mastah by breaking his own damn rules!  For some reason being asked that irritated the ever living shit out of me.  Actually, I know the reason, and it has to do with people essentially questioning the integrity of my boyfriend.   DIAF.  Yes, I know he’s sometimes a tardbucket.  He’s the Most Awesome Ever Boyfriend, but not always the Most Awesome Ever Raid Leader.  Deal.  Still, he’s not going to abuse the system that way.

Is he alt tabbed again? Yeah, probably.  He’s like a hyperactive little kid sometimes-always has to be doing something.  Seriously, I left him alone in the car once to do something real quick and I came back to find that he’d taken apart his dashboard.  The guy is wickedsmart, but that also means that any idle time-even in raids-finds his attention wandering.   Don’t worry, I am here for you to turn to whenever he doesn’t instantly respond to-wait, what?  No!  Leave me the fuck alone!  I am not his god damned answering service! 

Whatever, I got the Forethought Talisman last night.  Woo!

Roughly What Happened In Healer Channel, As Bids Go In
Me: It’s really hard not to turn around and look at your bids, guys!  XD
Kyr: If you win it…
Me:  >.>
Lyrandre receives item: Forethought Talisman
Me: <.<

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Priestly Dual Spec Rears Its Head…Again

“Why the hell didn’t you post yesterday, woman?”

My best friend flew in from California late on Monday night, and I took Tuesday off to goof off with him.  Not being at work generally means I’m not posting.  Said friend does not play WoW, though he dabbled before and I’ll get him back into it if I can.  But he likes gnome rogues.  Ew.


My priest.  And dual specs.  I honestly thought I had it figured out-Lyr was going to go shadow and I even had enough gear to reach hit cap and then some.  But then our healing roster shifted, and  BoO now sports this:

2 resto druids, 1 resto shaman, 2 holy paladins, 2 disc priests, 1 holy priest

We lost That Priest (he gquit on his own after a discussion with our GM, deciding that he wasn’t compatible with us anymore, by the way) and one of our most excellent trees is going back bear.  Now I’m not sure why we have a tree going bear when we have a fledgling prot warrior in the wings, but that’s not my problem.  Except it is if the warrior gets unhappy, but we won’t go there right now.  Aaaaanyway, that leaves our healing core a little weak in the AoE healing department, according to some sources.  Depending on how Ulduar shapes up, of course.  there’s another resto shaman who swore he’d come back for Ulduar, but I won’t hold my breath. 

Aaaaanyway, so The Most Awesome Ron and I were discussing both dual-speccing holy, and trading off who gets to suck lose the awesome pew pew lazer heals take one for the team help out the raid. 

But but…I don’t want to!  D:  I don’t WANT to have a failangel! 

“Amber, weren’t you debating doing that anyway?”

Well…well…maybe.  But that was before I decided to go shadow.  And before it was suggested that I might need to.  It’s one thing if I decide it and another if someone else tells me to, damn it!

Of course if Blizzard sticks to their Bring the Player Not the Class thing, then they’d have to allow for those raids that might, for one reason or another, not HAVE aoe healing, or have only weaker options (see: our Maly with a pally and a disc priest).   So then we could, in theory…remain our happy pew pew lazer specs…

…but my skepticism is puddling again.

There’s the whole disc gear =/= holy gear thing, too.  Can I go from disc to shadow by changing out some pieces?  Yes!  Can I go from disc to holy by changing out only a few pieces?  Noooooo.  Ughfail.

I’m currently trying to find out just how bad AoE damage in Ulduar isfrom those who’ve poked the PTR.

I dun wanna be holy!  I was looking forward to being able to DPS on something again.

…wait, what’s that sound?  Is that…my hunter calling me?

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Sometimes, I’m a Bitch

Like all humans, I am a flawed individual.  Sometimes, said flaws exhibit themselves in random thinly-veiled frustrated comments in vent after which I log off in an apparent huff (sorry, guys).

To most people, this made absolutely no sense.  Indeed, my behavior didn’t make much sense to me, either.  But I sat there and picked myself apart…

…and a lot of it comes down to guild drama.

I hate guild drama.  So why the fuck was I making it?

Shortly before my Random Angry!, a certain priest with which I seem to have entered Perpetual Drama Combat with talked to Josh on vent.  When I switched mains, my DKP switched from Ambrosyne to Lyrandre.  Now, the rules state that there’s no sharingDKP between characters-I can’t, for example, go back on Ambrosyne and then use some of what is now Lyr’s DKP for something.  But there was no mention of main swapping, at all.  My switch isn’t sudden, either-it’s been in the works for months, and as a random note, my Vent name has been Lyrandre since the day I rolled on Azgalor.  His questioning the situation was, perhaps, valid-but because it was That Priest, it grated on my nerves.  He’s already stated that I’ve been “put on notice” (ha, ha-how does a raid member put an officer on notice, anyway?), so now I just feel scrutinized.  If feel as if he’s waiting, and watching, for me to fuck up so that he can get upset over it.  Naturally that makes me want to be a right bitch just for the sake of it, which is…very very bad. 

To be fair, I’m sure he felt similarly scrutinized at the beginning of all this, when I originally started eyeballing our healers for improvement.  But there’s a difference between my trying to find ways to suggest that as a holy priest, you might want to do something other than spam Gheal on the tanks during raids, and his downright spiteful behavior.  I didn’t get upset over his healing for no reason.  One of the first things I did was talk to experienced holy priests to get their take on the situation.  When the general consensus was “Yeah, he kind of sucks,” then I tried to nudge him in the right direction.  When he took offense to that, I stopped.  His behavior since has only worsened.

So what the hell does all that have to do with my Random Angry? 

That Priest has become enough of an issue where he was going to be “talked to”-this was the general consensus reached by officers on Monday. 

So here we are on Friday, and he has not yet, to my knowledge, been “talked to”.  Now That Priest wasn’t always on, but he was last night.   I’m frustrated that it seemslike, to me, that heels are being dragged and I probably have the least amount of tolerance for it.  The guy’s copping an attitude left and right and not only towards me.  He’s tanked a raid on purpose “just to be an asshole” (his words!).  He’s not even raiding with us anymore, but rather spending a lot of time running with another guild, instead.  While it’s true that we’re not wanting for healers, when Naxx25 was progression content it would have been nice to have the most geared toon in the guild along (in theory, anyway).   Why the fuck are we just twiddling our thumbs about this?  So yeah, when the GM is asking for instance runs for his 78 warrior alt, and I’ve already instanced my toons to death of late, feel on edge already from earlier events, and want to know why the fuck problems aren’t being handled, I might be cranky. 

Not to say my behavior was called for-it wasn’t.  But nothing drives me more batshit insane than a problem I have to wait for someone else to handle. 

I think I’m going to keep my ass off vent for awhile, since it’s easier to edit what I type than to take back random shit that spews out of my mouth.

There’s also an undercurrent of “I pugged almost all of my normal runs and saved guildie instance help for heroics, why the fuck can’t you, Steve?” but that’s a whole ‘nother issue in and of itself.  Namely one called “fuuuuck I just did all those to death and YOU WANT ME TO GO BACK?  WAI?!?!”  How the hell do people have 3-4 80s already and still be sane?!

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