Insert vent session here.

Putting together a SiB raid is like one of those grid logic puzzles. Our two 10 mans have shrunk into one and a half, maybe, on a good day–which for summer is not surpising or even all that terrible.

Usually.

The…colorful personalities I have collected can cause issues, however.

• Player A will not raid with Player B.
• Player C would rather not raid with A.  B isn’t their favorite person either, but whatever.
• Player B has no idea what the fuck.
• Player D has a whole list of people they’d rather not raid with if given a chance but isn’t that strongly opinioned on the matter.  They’ll just bitch.  A lot.  In whispers.
• Player E doesn’t want to raid with A if they can help it, either.
• Player F would rather not raid with A…or G, H, or I.
• Player G likes everyone that most of the others tend to not like. (I’m glad someone does.)
• …etc.

…and that incompatible alphabet soup is why we did not have enough to raid last week.  Or rather, we technically would have had enough, if only everyone would Fucking Play Nice Together, but we can’t have nice things and it is what it is.  I love my guild as a whole, but individually?  Well…sometimes a GM just wants to choke a bitch.  But can’t, because she’s GM.  QQ.

And that is why I’ve been a cranky GM lately, because god damn it, children, I just want to fucking raid!  If I can’t have ALL of my favorite people at least SOME of my favorite people is better than NONE (I am totally player D, if you’re trying to guess). Mumble grumble.

>:|

Raiding With Your SO and Not Killing Them

…can be really hard.

I really wanted to punt Josh last night, which is a hilarious image if you consider the fact that I’m 5’9 and 125 lbs at most and he’s 6’10 and 280.  I could maybe get him to move a couple of inches if I ran into him going full tilt, but I don’t think I can punt him.

Anyway.

Look, kidlets, if you raid with your significant other you have to remember that what you do in a raid isn’t just affecting 9 or 24 strangers.  It’s affecting 8 or 23 people and the person you have the warm fuzzies for.  This means that if you’re aggravating people by standing far down the hall because you tabbed out to read something else and everyone is waiting on you to buff, your other half may very well be thinking of slapping you and unlike everyone else they can actually do it.

In any case, why the hell is it a-ok to aggravate said strangers, anyway?  If you’re in a raid then FOR FUCK’S SAKE RAID OR LEAVE. 

I won’t even touch the “officers should set an example” aspect of it.

Besides, if people know that you’re a couple and you’re not responding, guess who people are going to pester?  Yep!  Your SO!  Who the hell doesn’t want to act like your mother?  …yup, same answer!

Ashdajshdajshdjas.

…this is why Josh should not be allowed to bring home new toys on raid nights.  He wants to play with the toy, rather than raid. 

PAY ATTENTION OMG.

Derp derp.

Enrage in 3…2…1

I hold myself to high standards.  These standards bleed over onto the people around me, especially if they are fellow officers in my guild.  Remember-I am the recruitment officer.  I want to polish up the turd delightfully quirky mix of people that is my guild so that I can “sell” it to other people. 

Don’t say the words “it’s just Naxx”.  Just don’t.  It’s not “just Naxx”, it’s several hours of my time.  It’s several hours of 24 other people’s time, and this isn’t a pug-this is a guild run.  With several new guildies we would like to retain, which means, don’t be fucking lazy.  You weren’t listening to vent and had music turned up?  The requests for buffs were put in raid chat, several times.  You were sitting there playing with your dick and hitting the Holy Light button and not reading raid?  You have Pally Power-use it.  Is that box not the right color?  Click on it, and it’ll do the buffs for you!  Don’t laze your way through a class and spec I know and then act surprised when I call you on it.   People are rabid about their paladin buffs.  Rabid.  Don’t want to waste reagents when all of the melee dies on every trash pull in the Military Quarter?  Right click does baby buffs!  Holy shit!

You do realize that they are yelling at me for buffs because I am also a paladin, right?  And that when I have my buffs properly given out I don’t want to be nagged constantly because someone think I’m your fucking mother?

My position in this guild is not “Chief Nag”, here to make the rest of you do your jobs, even when your job is just not being a lazy ass paladin.  And don’t pull the “Well FINE just replace me and I’ll go PvP” bullshit ’cause that’s real fucking mature.

Speaking of maturity: I will not copy and paste this into the officer forums…I will not copy and paste this into the officer forums…I will not copy and paste this into the officer forums…

I will just post calling Randy a douche

Now I must go post a short, polite, reasoned explantion why I was so irritated last night…