Posts Tagged pew pew lazerz

Bringing Back The Bubbles

Hi, folks. Arrens here from that other site that hasn’t been updated regularly in far too long. Blame work. And work filters. And whatever else pops into my Sudofed-addled brain this morning.
 
Anyways, I asked my arch-nemesis if I could provide a guest post here. See, I’ve been leveling a priest for the better part of this year. Theodious is my dwarven disc priest, the dispenser of bubbles and all-around cad. (Seriously. I play on an RP server. If you happen upon Feathermoon-Alliance and engage in an in-character discussion with Theo AND you’re playing a female toon, run. Fast.) 
 
Theo isn’t my first attempt at a priest. He’s actually my 6th. (Amber in: it’s a disease; Lyr was 5th or 6th) The previous 5 never made it to level 20 before finding the delete button. They were tedious and boring and GODDAMMIT WHY WASN’T THE LFD SYSTEM OUT A LOT EARLIER?!
 
Ahem. Sorry. But Theo sat at level 12 for months. Seriously. For nearly 6 months, he gathered dust as I couldn’t be arsed to go out and smite my way through gnolls and spiders and the odd troll/yeti hiding in caves. But something happened along the way. I got the itch to level him, something I never could have foreseen. And I did. With great gusto. Full use of heirlooms and the LFD system had me tossing bubbles out left and right. I learned about spamming Flash Heal and have been laughed at time and again for my overuse of Renew as a non-holy priest. But you know what? It worked and I kept my groups mostly alive. (Except mages, who I still let die because my inner warlock chortles.) (FYI: you are supposed to let ROGUES and WARLOCKS die, not mages.  Mages give you noms.  Arrens is doin’ it wrong.)

 

This picture isn't relevent to anything. I'm just breaking up Arren's wall of text. You're welcome.

 
Then along comes patch 4.0.1 and everything gets flip-turned upside down. New talents, new spells, and SWEET BABY ZOMBIE JESUS MY MANA POOL JUST TRIPLED! So I have that going for me, which is nice.
 
Yesterday, Theo hit level 70. He’s been through Utgarde Keep (So.  Tired.  Of that instance.)  about a dozen times now and I’m thankful to largely be away from the new DK tanks who don’t know what threat generation is. (Seriously, guys. Use Blood Presence now if you’re tanking. This is non-negotiable and will cause me to drop group if you pull the first group in anything else.)  (If only it was just the DK tanks.  Oh my god.  Something about UK brings out the fail in tanks.)
 
“But Arrens,” I can hear you say. “What’s the fucking point of this post aside from telling us that you’ve done what everyone and their goddamn brother has done in leveling another toon?” To which I respond, Relax, skippy. I’m getting to that.
 
See, Amber’s blog is titled “For The Bubbles.” Yet, when’s the last time she talked anything about bubbles? She hasn’t in a long, long time. No, she’s almost all hunter, all the time. (Do you know how many disc priests you can have in a raid?!  THE ANSWER IS NOT THREE.)  Which is great and all, but the snark’s gone. (Gone my ass.  Wit’s as sharp as ever, baby.) She’s lost her bluster. (LOL) The fight between my arch-nemesis and I isn’t so much a fight anymore as it is a roflstomp on my part. (LOLOLOLOL.  Delusions!  So cute!) So as a means to get back to our roots, I’m going to provide her with some snark on this here blog and give the leveling tips from a Disc Priest’s perspective in the post-4.0 universe. Some of these are obvious no-brainers. They’ve been around since the dawn of WoW. But others? Well…some folks need could use a smack to the back of the head when they queue in the LFD. This is for them.
 
1.) I need mana. No, really. I need mana. Tanks, if I sit down for a drink because I’ve only got 1/4 of my mana left after you opted to pull the entire bloody instance, please let me fill it up before going back for more. I know you’re sadistic sonsabitches taking whacks to the head for the greater good, but I can’t heal you unless you see blue under my green health bar. If you continue to run all willy-nilly and we wipe due to your impatience, I will leave. (Sidenote: Priests need Life Tap. Serious.)


2.) Power Word: Barrier is a pretty cool mechanic. It’s like a giant bubble for the whole group. You stand under it, you don’t get hurt and any heals I cast on you are increased by 3%. So melee? STOP RUNNING OUT FROM UNDER IT, YOU FUCKTARDS! I have two level 80 rogues. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many inappropriate uses of Sprint as when I cast PW: Barrier. You’re all giving my second favorite class a bad name. I hate you.  (I’d say that it’s because we’ve trained them SO WELL to not stand in things, but anyone who heals knows that no, they haven’t absorbed that lesson, either.   So really they have…no excuse.  Except not understanding the AWESOME that is PW: Barrier.)


 
3.) Prot Pallys, I don’t know what’s happened to you since 4.0. You used to be my favorite class to heal, what with your awesome AOE threat generation and your, what I can only guess was, fantastic dodging and parrying abilities. But that’s all changed. Every pally I’ve healed in the past week has been taking some pretty incredible damage. Stop that. Please. You make me go into an anaphylactic shock all the damn time now.
 
4.) Warrior tanks, you have replaced Prot Pallys as my favorite tanks to heal. Keep it up, guys and gals. 
 
5.) This one isn’t so much a tip or even an observation I’ve seen happening frequently as it is just (what I hope was) a singular event that occurred yesterday in UK. I’m in a group with one of those aforementioned prot pallys that couldn’t keep threat on more than two mobs at a time. We had a rogue, a fury warrior, a frost mage and myself filling out the group. All the DPS were pretty decently geared for upper-60’s, low-70’s toons and were constantly pulling threat. The frost mage, on several occasions, kept pulling entire groups off the pally and would proceed to run. Not to the tank. Not to me, the healer. No, he would start running backwards as fast as his gnomish feet would carry him. Well out of LOS of me and way to far for the pally to lay down a consecrate. When he died for the sixth time in that run, I was laughing so hard I had tears streaming down my face. Nothing makes me giddier with glee than seeing a mage die. Make it a gnome? Well hell. It’s like my birthday and Christmas all rolled into one.  (Isn’t it DELIGHTFUL when they do that?  Their repair bills are like a stupidity tax.)
 
So there ya have it, folks. My tales of leveling as Disc in the post-4.0 apocalypse. Any tales to share of your own? Toss ’em in the comments.

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I Am That Crazy Healer In Your PUGs

When a guildie offered to pop into queue for FoS as heals so that my hunter wouldn’t languish forever, I gladly accepted.  After proving to myself, yet again, that THE TRINKET DOES NOT EXIST, I hopped over to Lyrandre to return the favor.

It’s at the point now where anything but Halls of Reflection is boring.  Thus I feel almost compelled to apologize to any group I’m in beforehand, because boredom does bad things to me.

Imagine this: you zone in to Forge of Souls.  Your healer screams in party, “IF THE TRINKET DROPS WHILE I AM ON MY PRIEST I SWEAR BY ALL THAT IS HOLY THAT I WILL DROWN A KITTEN.”

You’d probably look at her at least a little bit sideways.  Anyway, you move on.  You make the first pull.  This time the charming little space goat says something along the lines of “Bubble, PoM, renew, nap.”  The other priest in the group laughs knowingly.  Apparently napping isn’t actually on the agenda however, because during the next two pulls she is…hopping around the group casting Holy Nova?

Moments later you see “HOLY FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRE” as she casts said spell on one of the mobs.  The ret pally by this point is giving some of the casters hugs, but the priest does catch her before she dies.  “Oh,” she says.  “Someone actually needed healing.”

The paladin, blessedly in the spirit of the moment, replied with “I’m just helping to keep you awake.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have raided the easter chocolate,” your healer confesses.  Aha.

The run continues uneventfully–and deathlessly–with the priest happily running  around the party in circles, casting holy nova…

 Beware asking me to heal heroics for you, I guess.  >.>

(The trinket my hunter wants did not drop, but that just adds more weight to my theory that IT DOESN’T EXIST.)

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Where are my sparklies?

Lately I feel like I do a lot of complaining about holy paladins, which is just silly because I was the one who decided to change my main from my disc priest to the holy paladin in the first place! And while I LOVE healing as a paladin (crazy, I know. I just love pushing two buttons), that doesn’t excuse that there are sometimes serious issues with it.

Yeah, I’m talking about the lack of awesome spell effects.

Look at discipline priests – Amber gets to throw out OMG PEW PEW LAZER BEAMS, and when she bubbles someone and there’s a crit, BAM, rainbows in your face! What’s not to like about rainbow soap bubbles? Even holy priests have PoM bouncing around, and probably other cool looking things that I don’t know about, because I’ve never been a Fail Angel. Trees get little green leaves and swirls on their targets, which is pretty sweet and very fitting for the class. Shamans have some sort of water falling on your head spell that makes me go “crap, what am I standing in, MOVE” whenever it’s cast on me, because I’ve been taught that if you see something besides plain ground, you need to haul ass. Not to mention that chain heal looks pretty snazzy when it’s moving around.

What do paladins have? Itty beams of light and glitter, and the exact same beams and glitter for both FoL and HL. This is insufficient for my needs, Blizzard. I require big explosions of light – when I cast Holy Light on a tank I want to see Light dripping from his every pore. Beacon of Light? HA, those silly Elder’s moonstones that everyone’s playing with right now are brighter than my bacon. There could be no confusion amongst multiple paladins in a raid when it comes to who’s Beaconing whom if there were actually a huge pillar of light over the Beacon, rather than an animation that makes the target dispense some light beams from her armpit. Sacred Shield is even disappointing because it doesn’t look like ANYTHING most of the time.

Pally wings are pretty much the only amazing spell effect that I have at my disposal, but WAIT! I have to save those for important moments involving Divine Plea and massive amounts of damage, so they don’t even get blown on many fights unless I do it at the end, because I’m always worried that I might need them later. Their awesome is not enough to make up for the fact that the majority of my healing looks boring, like this:

Amber Edits to Add:

Here, I fixed it for you.

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ZOMG A YEAR

A year ago (give or take-technically, it was the 29th), I was sitting at work.  Almost no one was there and I was bored as hell.  I worked through all the blogs that I read and eventually ran out of interesting, unblocked internet to read.

So…I decided to write a blog.  I never had any ambitions, I just wanted to pass the time at work and perhaps entertain/post the occasional useful tidbit.  When I started, I had a holy paladin chewing through Naxx and a baby disc priest…

…and now I’ve given up the holy paladin gig for tanking bubbles, and the priest has stolen the spot light.

All in all, it’s been an amazing year!  I can’t believe that I now regularly get over a thousand hits a day.  Holy crap, that’s a lot of really bored people wandering this way!

Happy new year, merry bubbling, and may you not have much of the RL equivialant of standing in fires this upcoming year!

Me, I’ll probably be posting pictures of some of my guildies being drunk later…

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Blargh.

Apparently you can two disc priest heal ToC10 up until…oh…Anub.

Then it doesn’t work so well.  :(

What the hell happened to our usual ToC10 lolfest?!  Damn you, Kotakh!  You and your dentist appointments! /shakefist

ETA:  Anub basically went like this…

LOLOLOL STACKS OF POISON EVERYWHERE!

DEATH LOL!!!

….yeah.  We made it to phase 3 once, and then failed because…well…I don’t know about the other two healers, but I was OOM.  And I was sad, because normally we just roffle all over that place.  QQ.

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25s: wooooo!

So last night, BoO made its return to 25s.

Yaaaaaay!

We still need some solid DPS-we pugged a couple, some of our own still need work, and some alts made appearances.  Of course part of the alt fun was because two nublettes decided that it was okay to take their healer mains to a pug Ulduar25 since OMG we have so many heals right?  …and then we’re short a healer come the night of our run.  

Don’t do that.  You know who you are and you of all people should know better.  :P  Yes, we have more healers than you can shake a stick at.  Yes, you have alts that are capable of going into Ulduar25.  But you have no idea if one of our other healers might have connection issues, wife aggro, kid aggro, or whatever at the last minute.   Save your god damn mains for god damned guild runs. 

Let me tell you, the last thing I want on what is still progression content is Josh healing.  Not because Josh isn’t a fine holy paladin-he is-but because I want him tanking.  

Besides, on his pally Josh gets all up in my healing business.  “I think that not having healing assignments on this was a bad idea.”  Really?  It was a one tank fight  (pummelbot bitch doesn’t really count).  Do I have to explicitly tell you that you’re a tank healer and should therefore be on the tank?  And that the raid healers should be on the raid?  Hello?  /thwack 

If we have an excess of tank healers (and we did, last night) then I’m going to be the one on raid bitch duty.  This is fine with me as I’m the most used to it.  I really want to push the tanks to be comfortable with Celaeno, anyway.  Know the Celaeno, love the Celaeno.  I am not the only disc priest.  I do not want to be the only disc priest.   Feel the warm embrace of the other disc priest’s bubbles…  They seem a bit insecure sometimes because she’s not on vent (with reason), but they’ll have to get over it.  I’ll make them.  >:|  

I’m not sure if my tendency to hand out similar healing assignments is good, or bad.  Familiarity vs boredom?  I’m most likely to assign Kotakh the floating “assist on the tanks but watch the raid”  because I know he’ll be on top of it.  And well…raid is raid.  I could switch up the tank assignments, but…Josh wants me healing him.  So.  You try to work with that and make it interesting, damn it!

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Why Disc Is Totally Awesome And Holy Is Not

(Disclaimer: I love holy priests, just not being one.)

  • We have LASER HEALS.
  • We can sprinkle the raid with bubbles.
  • We can put bubbles on TOP of bubbles.
  • Did I mention that we have laser heals?
  • We can make people REALLY SHINY with Pain Suppression!
  • We can make other people REALLY SPARKLY with Power Infusion!
  • We have huge….pools of mana.
  • PEW PEW LASER.
  • Oh, and bubbles.  Mm, bubbles.

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