Hello, Goodbye…

I think it’s past time to close up shop here at ILB land. I don’t have a lot of WoW talk to share these days, and despite making an attempt or two, can’t bring myself to blog non-WoW stuff here, either.

But fear not!  You can find me over here form now on, instead. I promise I will still toss out the occasional flowchart, the content will just be a lot more…random in topic.

What is this I don’t even

I left Lyr in the image so that you can appreciate this happening when I’m on my priest and not my DK.

My Life As A 75 Resto Druid, In A Nutshell

• Cast ALL THE HOTS
• Get ALL THE ADD AGGRO
• Die
• Remember Shadowmeld
• Cast ALL THE HOTS
• Get ALL THE AGGRO
• Shadowmeld!
• CAST ALL THE HOTS
• Get ALL THE AGGRO
• Shadowmeld is on cooldown
• Die

This is how bear became my off spec. It might be time to revist that…

Um, how do you bear tank again?

Guild Culture

The culture of a guild is often a key point in guild selection. If you’re a very silly person in a very serious guild (or vice versa), chances are people will be rubbed the wrong way. Being a super serious raider in a casual raiding guild will drive everyone crazy–you’ll think they’re slackers, they’ll think you’re an elitst cumbucket, and no one will be happy.

Matching your personality to that of your guild is important–so tell me, why the hell do people stay in guilds they don’t like?

I set the tone of my guild more so than some GMs, in large part because so many recruits come from the blog. If you like the blog you usually have at least an appreciation for crude humor and absolute silliness, making Stands in Bad absolute hell for anyone who can’t stand a lot of penis jokes.

We had a guildie put in an app to another guild for his main and state that he had me on ignore because I “said stupid things”.  And WORSE YET, when he’d complain?  Everyone else would chime in and say THE SAME STUPID THINGS.  Those Hyperbole and a Half quotes, man, aren’t they terrible?

He took his main out of the guild but left all his alts in, which confuses me terribly. If you hate the guild jokes so much–and they are all very much guild jokes by this point, WE ALL SAY ALL THE THINGS–why the bloody hell are you still around, shitting up the place with your poor attitude? And just to be clear I’m not talking about poor attitude meaning he just doesn’t like my jokes. I mean there’s been shit-stirring forum posts and the like during some other recent drama.

Let’s face it, in any given personality conflict situation, this sort of thing is what often ends up happening.  The person who doesn’t fit in gets upset, and if s/he doesn’t just quietly leave some day, s/he usually starts acting up. Next thing you know they are stirring up shit and you often have no idea why. 

Now I hate gkicking people, I really do, and the more tied up you are to other people, the more I hate doing it.  In a case like this it’s even weirder: what do I say as to my reasoning? You’ve been kind of a giant cockmonger lately and we know you don’t like us anyway,  so why don’t you get the fuck out?

It all comes back to the initial question for me: If people don’t like the guild, why do they stay?  I can understand if a raid spot is important to you, but if you’re not raiding, what keeps you?  If it’s for some particular group of friends, are they happy in the guild?  If they are but you’re not, and you find yourself getting increasingly bitter over stuff, don’t you stop to think that maybe you’re starting to make it less enjoyable for them?

Guild culture is critically important for me–if I don’t like the atmosphere and the people, I’m not staying, and that’s seems to be the attitude of most people. Is there a motivation I’m missing here? Are level 25 guilds that awesome still? Is there an enjoyment some people take in pissing in the pool?

I boggle, internet.

ETA: WordPress just killed me with lulz.

You used the following categories and tags: Amber doesnt know what the hell is wrong with you sometimes, Stuff and Things, dinged up GM hat, what is this I dont even, and wtf.

Add a couple more to make your post easier for others to discover. Some suggestions: personality conflict, penis jokes, poor attitude, cumbucket, and absolute hell.

You’re right, WordPress.  Cumbucket should really be a tag.

Now it is.

Rades and Bubbles Discuss!: Alysrazor

 Rades:  damn
we need to kill Alysrazor
that bird drops THREE upgrades for us
 me:  fffff that boss
 Rades:  we haven’t tried it yet
 me:  we did, hahaha
FEATHERS
AUGH
 Rades:  BUT
STAR FOX
<3
me:  Imagine a draenei DK running in circles looking for adds
then going AAAH WORM
AAAAH
AAAH THE BIRD IS ON ME BECUASE THE OTHER PERSON DIED GET IT OFF GET IT OFF
FUCK ADD
INTERRUUUUPTTTTTTT
AAAAH WORM
OMG OMG OMG FIRE TORNADOS????????
OMG
OMG THEY ARE EVERYWHERE
OMG WE ALL DIED and that is the fight as I know it
 Rades:  hahaha
you should write that up right now
as your Alysrazor Strat 1.0
DO IT
XD
 me:  and continue my lack of genuine content on ILB?  hahaha
 Rades:  VERBATIM
lol
you had cursing
hahaha

You are doing WHAT to my ice cubes?

MMO-Champ, in their merry datamining, dug up a teensy little change that none the less causes much flailing on my end: a 1.5 second cast time on hungering cold, which is currently instant.

Let’s do a quick review of what I use my beloved ice cubes for, shall we?

-a spell interrupt when my others are on cooldown (PvE and PvP)
-a way to stop spinny mobs of doom (PvE)
-an emergency “oh god this mob got loose HERE TANK GET IT” form of “CC” (PvE)
-a way to really piss off horde that are going for the same mining node I am (PvP) (MAI PYRITE BITCHES)
-A way to protect the flag carrier from being hounded  (PvP)
-an AoE interrupt (o hai Cho’gal worshippers)
-Randomly, just to confuse people and to bring me delight (PvE and PvP!)

I may have forgotten something, but that is my general list of Things I Use Hungering Cold for as a frost DK. I use it a lot and love it to death. It’s also, importantly, a mandatory talent–you need it to pick up Howling Blast at the end of the tree.

Do you know how many of those uses are compatible with a cast time of 1.5 seconds?

None of them. Not a single god damned one. Except maybe the confuse and delight one, but then it would throw off my rotation more and this reduce my DPS and precious e-peen.

What the fuck, Blizz?

You can go ahead and nix that change right now.  >:|

Search Terms of the Week

My favorite search terms of the week:

“the sexodar” (People still go there?)
“bastion of twilight penesis” (Where?)
“how to ascendant council” (how I mine for fish?)
“mine seagulls” MINE?  MINE?
“amber is a dork”  (yes, yes she is, by why was this a search term?)
“fucked up dragon on speed”
“omg every1 knoes dks cant tank lol nub”  (LOL)
“cuntcanoe” 

“what does it mean when you say “what is this i dont even””  will be explained by the ultimate winner of the week!  Here it is:

“www you jizz fuck my sister”
I’m not kidding guys:

An Argument for DBM

Sounds silly that we’d need an argument FOR DBM, right?  I mean, who DOESN’T use DBM, or their favorite equivilant?

Yeah, about that. Anyone who has ever tried to require an addon knows that someone, somewhere, will bitch about it. Back in BoO I tried to make everyone use DBM, but it was really hard when my co-GM couldn’t be arsed to use it himself.

“You don’t notice,” he’d brag.  “I know the fights.”

“Steve,” I said wearily, or more often angrily, “I notice every single god damn time you ask how long it is until something happens and I have to look at my DBM timers and tell you.”

He may have gotten away with that in Wrath, but such an attitude is a total no-go in Cata.  Fights are chaotic with MANY things to pay attention to, and stay out of–or in!  Add in trying to keep on top of your rotation and procs an you’re going to miss some things.

No, you will.  You WILL.  You absofuckingloutely WILL, stop arguing with me–oh here, look.  IT’S SCIENCE.

“Well,” some of the problem children may splutter, “SOME people notice.  SOME people can split their attention better.  I’m one of them.” 

Really?  Every single fight?  You’re never tired or distracted or have a cat walk in front of you or otherwise need of GIANT BLUE TEXT?

I call bullshit.

Go install the god damned mod.

(Thankfully I don’t have this problem with anyone in SiB, but I figured that someone, somewhere…)

Bastion of Twilight: Halfus Wyrmbreaker

Bastion of Twilight: Halfus Wyrmbreaker
King of the If-Thens
or Omnomitron, with Dragons

“Amber,” you’re probably wondering, “What is with the ‘King of the If-Thens’ thing?” 

He’s the King of the If-Thens because while reading strats my head started to hurt.  So much so that I doubt this will be as funny as usual, I don’t have cheap opportunities for penis jokes.

Like Nef of old, every week is different due to the random combination of drakes that can be freed.  This means a lot of headdesking for everyone involved at first.  I have only attempted this boss a few times, so if there’s errors, just let me know and I’ll try to fix them.  Expect a lot of repeated info from section to section because, OMG, so much shit.

General Overview

This is a two tank fight.  The proto drake that is present does not need to tanked, it’ll just sometimes chuck things at you (Thanks buddy!).  Instead you’ll have one tank on Halfus and one on the released drake(s).

When you walk into the room, two drakes will have cartoon-like seeing stars effects over their heads.  These will be the drakes that are NOT active that week.  You can walk over to the drakes you plan on releasing without aggroing the boss.  How many drakes you release depends on who is up–we were releasing two, thanks to the fucked up combo we got (Nether + Slate + Storm, FUUUUUCK), but the video I watched showed only one.  YMMV.

Berserk timer: 6 minutes.

I just wanted to draw a dragon. This one may be considering eating you.

Tanks
If the Slate Dragon is up, Halfus will gain Malevolent Strikes.  This applies a stacking healing debuff, and will require the tanks to swap to drop the stacks.  When this drake is released, the boss will periodically be stunned for 12 seconds (I presume this is long enough for the debuff to drop, perhaps negating the need to swap tanks once Slate is released).

If the Nether Scion is up, Halfus’ attack speed will double.  When released, he will cast a debuff that will reduce his chance to hit, attack speed, and damage done by 25%. 
Note: when we had both Nether and Slate up at once, the MS stacked absurdly fast, so releasing the Scion seemed to make a huge difference. 

If the Storm Rider is up, Halfus gains a shadow nova.  It does roughly 30k shadow damage and knocks everyone back.  Needless to say this ability is an ABSOLUTE BITCH, because until you release the drake, interrupting the nova is well nigh impossible.  Once the Storm Rider is released, however, the cast time is slowed and you can (and need to!) interrupt.   The tank may need to pitch in with interrupts here and there.
When we attempted this fight, two of us (DPS DK and warrior) stayed on Halfus to cover interrupts, because our interrupts were on too long of a CD to handle it with only one.  The first shadow nova seems to make it off regardless, so be aware of that and use what cooldowns you can.

If the Emerald Whelps are up, then the proto drake gains scorching breath.  I have a hunch this means you should not stand in front of him.  If you release the whelps, then they case a stacking poision that reduces the proto drake’s damage done.   You should probably still not stand in front of him, though. 
Note: I watched a video and this may well be unavoidable damage.  Fuck if I know for sure. 

If the Time Warden is up, then the proto drake will spit random fireballs at people.  Thanks, asshole!  At least if you release him he slows down the cast rate. 

Other things: Below 50% Halfus will periodically cast Furious Roar, which will deal ~10k damage and knock everyone down.

Healer
If the Slate Dragon is up, Halfus will gain Malevolent Strikes.  This applies a stacking healing debuff, and will require the tanks to swap to drop the stacks.  When this drake is released, the boss will periodically be stunned for 12 seconds (I presume this is long enough for the debuff to drop, perhaps negating the need to swap tanks once Slate is released).

This will probably make you cry, so prepare to kiss your mana goodbye and be ready to cover switching tanks.

If the Nether Scion is up, Halfus’ attack speed will double.  When released, he will cast a debuff that will reduce his chance to hit, attack speed, and damage done by 25%. 
Note: when we had both Nether and Slate up at once, the MS stacked absurdly fast, so releasing the Scion seemed to make a huge difference. 

Just more ow for your tanks.

If the Storm Rider is up, Halfus gains a shadow nova.  It does roughly 30k shadow damage and knocks everyone back.  Although the drake should be released shortly so that it can be interrupted, it seems like the first shadow goes off regardless, so be aware of that and use what cooldowns you can.

If the Emerald Whelps are up, then the proto drake gains scorching breath.  I have a hunch this means you should not stand in front of him.  If you release the whelps, then they case a stacking poision that reduces the proto drake’s damage done.   (Note: having watched a video with this active, it may be unavoidable damage)

Oh look more shit for you to heal through!

If the Time Warden is up, then the proto drake will spit random fireballs at people.  Thanks, asshole!  At least if you release him he slows down the cast rate. 

…even MORE shit to heal through!

Other things: Below 50% Halfus will periodically cast Furious Roar, which will deal ~10k damage and knock everyone down.  Do I need to say it?

DPS
If the Slate Dragon is up, Halfus will gain Malevolent Strikes.  This MS-like ability will mean that your tanks will be switching, so you might want to watch your aggro a litle more closely.
When this drake is released, the boss will periodically be stunned for 12 seconds\ (I presume this is long enough for the debuff to drop, perhaps negating the need to swap tanks once Slate is released).  Enjoy the easy DPS time!

If the Nether Scion is up, things will happen that you don’t really care about.  Next!

If the Storm Rider is up, Halfus gains a shadow nova.  It does roughly 30k shadow damage and knocks everyone back.  Needless to say this ability is an ABSOLUTE BITCH, because until you release the drake, interrupting the nova is well nigh impossible.  Once the Storm Rider is released, however, the cast time is slowed and you can (and need to!) interrupt.  
When we attempted this fight, two of us (DPS DK and warrior) stayed on Halfus to cover interrupts, because our interrupts were on too long of a CD to handle it with only one.  The first shadow nova seems to make it off regardless, so be aware of that and use what cooldowns you can.  If you’re an interrupt bitch do not leave Halfus ever OMG.

If the Emerald Whelps are up, then you will have fire breathed on you.  Damn.

If the Time Warden is up, then you will have random fireballs spit at you.  Ow.

Other things: Below 50% Halfus will periodically cast Furious Roar, which will deal ~10k damage and knock everyone down.  Fuck being knocked down oh my god.

Uh, Blizz?

I’m pretty sure I had en epic above 213 in that slot before.  And uh…the peice that I put in my head slot, replacing a green?  Wasn’t…epic…either.  It was…blue.

/boggle